Captain’s Log: Twenty Fore

So there I was, walking home from the diner at 5am on a Thursday morning, less than a block away from the police station, when I notice that a house on the other side of the street has their front door wide open, and I spend the rest of my 10 minute walk home debating whether I should call the police. As I write this, in the bathroom (of course), I can’t help but think about all of the comments I’ve made here about me going to the bathroom. Unrelated, I just realized that the ‘Bombing Hurricanes’ idea actually came from Sharknado. You ever catch yourself having a conversation with yourself in the mirror, and then as you start to walk away, lean back in order to get the last word in? I will never understand short-sleeved button up shirts, someone please explain to me when it is appropriate to dress that formsual. What a sad life, no one cares about the wave until it is about to break and/or crash. When exactly was going to the store barefoot and shirtless a widespread issue? How, and why does flat sparkling water somehow taste worse than regular water?

Yep, it’s official, I’ve been single so long that instead of “how’s your dating life going” I get “U still single?” Am I really the only one who duznt txt lyk dis!? Is now a good time to comment on “Us” encouraging racism amongst ourselves or should I sit back down? If you are a ___________, with a firm opinion on how other ___________s should think, carry themselves, and/or interact with others, I have questions. Kinda disappointed that the almost-fight I just witnessed at work didn’t turn into actual fisticuffs. Let’s normalize normalizing things. Also, let’s normalize not normalizing things.

So, I have apparently ‘I’ll run tomorrow’ed my way through this entire month. In the beginning of this song, if he was REALLY that famous, you wouldn’t have to ask if we remember him. I don’t want to support the post, but is there a way that I can ‘like’ the fact check? I REALLY can’t wait to be able to talk freely about my feelings on what is going on here. Crazy how much of a fuss the “don’t invest more than you’re willing to lose” people make when they end up losing more than they were willing to invest. FINALLY downloaded my pictures and deactivated my Facebook, and just like that, all is right in the world.

There’s a lot of ‘demanding more attention than you’re willing to give’ energy floating around lately. The more I follow the stock market the more I realize, Cathie Woods is kinda hot. Once again, I’ve discovered a reason not to drink. Not gonna lie, Space Force’s nickname is actually pretty cool. Maybe too cool. I wholeheartedly refuse to be in a relationship where I am referred to as “bro”, “bruh”, or anything close.

The more I think about it, the less certain I become that BINGO was the dog’s name. On a similar note, I can’t in good conscience perpetuate the lie the Humpty Dumpty was an egg. Gotta add people who use decorative pillows to the list of people who are not to be trusted. Slowly (very slowly) but surely (eh) making my comeback and blogging regularly (ish). I REALLY want to write right now, but I have nothing to write. What a sigh of relief, but I’m not holding my breath for the next one.

Went to bed too early, now I’m wide awake at 1am. Still madly in love, and madly unrealistic. Yes, you are wearing a mask, but if you could please just humor me and turn your head instead of coughing directly onto things that others have to touch. I understand that the sequels were pretty bad, but seriously, why haven’t we remade Universal Soldier yet? Speaking of 20 year wars, the right to do what a person wishes with their own body, refer to their body in the way they see fit, and be in a relationship with other (both similar and dissimilar) bodies has been under attack for… What year is it again?

~

Until next time, damn, I really miss writing!

Ok, I think it’s time, I need to find a new ‘Captain’s Log’ picture…