Unicorn

“Thank you for offering to give me a ride. The agency was supposed to have someone waiting for me, but I guess that fell through. I mean, I know that we are going to your home town but still, not everyone is so kind. And you know the Wilfrid Laurier Apartments? You don’t happen to know a man named James who lives there do ya?

Rumor has it, as rumor often does, that the location of James’s apartment was once the unicorn hatchery. Yea, I know. It sounds, um, let’s call it “far fetched”. According to “legend”, flocks of horned horses would go there, every fall to lay their eggs. Eggs! Freaking eggs man. I’m sorry, you just don’t seem to be as put off by this story as I was when I first heard it. Hell, I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. Oh, I forgot, male unicorns come to lay the eggs. Yea. Similar to seahorses I guess, the female transfers her eggs to the man. During intercourse the eggs travel up his urethra and collect in his scrotum where he fertilizes and transports them to this location where they are laid and later hatched.

I understand that you are driving but c’mon, how is your jaw not on the floor yet!? Apparently, after they built the Wilfrid Laurier complex the unicorns continued to migrate here and would just set up shop on the roof. Anyhoo, we got a call from someone who knows someone who is related to someone who blah blah blah, somehow james’ disappearance has been linked to this story. So they called in the calvary…

The calvary sent me. This should honestly only take one night. I’m going to stakeout the roof of the apartment, where there have been “sightings”, and report back in the morning. Sssooo… Would you mind waiting for me down here? You never know, some old lady might see me on the roof and have a fit. It’s just always best to have an escape plan, ya know? You can keep the meter running,
You’ve been awfully quiet. I’m sorry for blabbing. It’s just, I’m the new guy, and this is what they give me for my first assignment. And… Did you hear that?”

“You… You aren’t going to hurt them when you see them… Are you?”

“Nnno, we don’t do that. If I happen to come across anything out of the ordinary tonight I’ll just….. “When?””

This picture couldn’t be more perfect. Thank you Ruby! To check out more of her amazing work please go to https://www.instagram.com/rubymediamakeup/

15 Comments Add yours

  1. UNICORNS!!!!!!! ❤

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    1. Haha you can thank giggles for this one… I had to break up the dark writing a bit

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Well it was kinda worth it!!

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    3. Well thank you! Maybe I’ll try more like this in the future… Maybe

      Liked by 1 person

    4. Yaaay.. no maybe.. just do it (I should really ask Nike to pay me.. the number of times i use that phrase…lol)

      Like

    5. Haha tag them! Can you do that? Is that even a thing? Lol

      Liked by 1 person

    6. I don’t know.. Don’t think so.. lol

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    7. Be a lot cooler if you could

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  2. Don’t read this comment until after 9 am…10 to be safe.

    OMG OMG OMG OMG! UNCIORNS?!?!?!? WWWHHHHAAAAAATTTTT from eggs?! Awesome! Omg omg omg omg omg. I needed that this morning! YAY unicorns!!! Hehe “when”. They are totally real! Omg omg omg

    Okies…I’m done. Wooosha.

    Like

    1. Lol thank you! I was worried that it wouldn’t be cutesie enough

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    2. haha it’s not cutesie really…but it’s unicorns! so YAY!!!

      Like

    3. Lol yea, no lollipops and gumdrops

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    4. then I think you might just need to try again 😛 hehe not really. It was great! T approved

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    5. Haha I might give it another go… We’ll see

      Liked by 1 person

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