Captain’s Log Hate Teen

PLEASE stop sending the same pictures that you plan on posting online to your significant other. People who wait for a reply before they text you what they originally contacted you to tell you need to have their texting privileges revoked. Also, people who send a barrage of texts instead of one long message need to have their phones taken away. Wash your hands after using the bathroom, while you’re still in the bathroom, so that the descending poo-particles have a clean and clear path to land on your skin. All of this Army Navy Game hype just oddly reminded me of #NiggerNavy, and I can’t stop thinking about it. The past two women that I was in a relationship with have ended up engaged and/or married less than a year after our relationship ended…

So, ladies… If you’re trying to get married you should probably date me, just saying. Finally got the courage and wherewithal to unfollow her. It’s either this or I’m going to keep “accidentally” making my way to her page. Annddd guess who just liked my posts. I’m getting pretty excited and nervous about this run.

So, #BookTree is a thing, and it is amazing! I don’t think I own enough books for a sturdy tree, yet. Yep, still miss her. We talked today, I’m glad that everything is going well with her and her family, and (I assume) her relationship. I’m glad that she’s happy. But, I’m not sure if I’m ready to actually see her happy with someone else.

Like, I can “see” it and be happy for them, but I don’t want to actually “see” it. I should probably get some worms and get this compost going. I think there’s a rather large misconception about what impeachment actually is. So, I’m like 90% sure that I have an online stalker. I’m not sure how to handle this. I just bought a drink that was previously opened, so yeah, that’s cool.

And I just accidentally scheduled a rant to post on Christmas day. I just realized that there’s people who will spend their entire lives without ever once pumping their own gas. If you in any way identify as a minority you should take a good hard look at how you view the other minorities, all of them. See if you can spot any similarities in the ways that you’ve been perceived, talked to, talked about, and treated. Annddd someone just called a hashtag on my blog transphobic. Not the nicest person in the world, each and every response that I got was pretty confrontational, but…

They actually have a point. And now I’m getting blasted on Instagram… And getting contacted by random others to talk about it… At least this one is polite. Had a dream about this course that I’m going to. We talked, and apparently she’s not entirely happy.

I’m not sure what to do with this. I’m not sure what I can do with this. I hate making plans with these guys. Love the guys, but HATE the planning. All I want for Christmas is a little peek at the naughty list. I’ve been asking Noodle if he’s heard back from the schools that he tested for for the past (what feels like) two months and the moment that I decide to let it go he goes “oh, did I tell you that I got into <School P> and got a $4,000 offer from <School J> a couple of days ago?”

This guy! I still can’t believe that I got called out while searching for a picture for this pronoun rant. Like, I’m not the enemy here. Maybe I should reconsider posting that rant. Pretty sure the posts that I have planned for this year are going to get me in trouble. I miss her.

Maybe us talking again, while she’s in a relationship and I’m in whatever this is, isn’t the best idea in the world. Someone please explain to me the thought process behind putting toilet paper in the urinal and leaving toilet paper on the seat in port-a-johns. Also, is the term “port-a-johns” really a military thing? I feel like I’ve heard that in other places. This isn’t going to end well. I mean, I think it will in the long term, but it’s going to suck in the moment.

So… I think we just got back together? Kinda? I don’t know. I guess we’re just acknowledging that we want to be together, but we’re not together, yet. I hate relationships.

I’m going to need some critique partners. Stop asking your military friends for inside information. They don’t know, and whatever they do know is best kept to themselves. I wonder what the chances are that that hotel has a military discount. I’m thinking Zero. No Tulsi?

Again!? I’m half tempted to submit a crappy story and let them critique the crap out of it. Oh, wow, mostly good reviews on this one. Am I really the only one who hates filtered pictures and videos? So “ball lightning” is a thing. That’s terrifying.

Not gonna lie, I’m feeling a little used. I still can’t decide if ugly people dating each other is a good or bad thing. If you find yourself in a situation where strangers are pulling out their phones to record you please just stop what you’re doing and walk away. I just came across what might be the most interesting sign that I’ve ever seen. It was on top of a urinal and read “please do not eat gum from urinal”, who the hell is this message for!? Is this sign REALLY a necessary deterrent?


Until next time, learn from your mistakes.