Boom Sticks

So I’ve recently decided on two things.

One: I am no longer going to refrain from cursing in my blog. If you are a regular reader you’re probably thinking that it doesn’t really matter because you’ve read some of my explicit writing. I admit, I haven’t bit my tongue all that much when it came to writing fiction, but everything else has been more or less PG… PG 13… Ok, it hasn’t been littered with every curse that came to mind while writing. Until now. It’s 2018, deal with it.

Two: I am no longer going to hold back my opinion on polarizing issues. I’m so tired of knuckleheads assuming that they know where I stand and using “our” opinion on a situation to put down someone else’s. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m all for stomping out stupidity, but you have to understand that stupidity is subjective. I know there are going to be a TON of people that completely disagree with what I’m about to say and how I’m about to say it. Seriously, this post probably isn’t going to go way you want. If you’re a sensitive little bitch I suggest you turn, tuck tail, and go about your business. I know that there are going to be a ton of people out there that are going to downplay my opinion, pick it apart piece by piece, and somehow use it to further their own idiotic narrative. Have at it!

Ok, so the topic of today’s rant… Guns. -O to the M G, did he just say “Guns”!?- Yes. Guns. Let me tell you a little story about a conversation that my friend, Brad, and I had a while back. While stuck in the car together on the back end of our road trip to West Virginia someway somehow the topic of gun control came up. Fortunately, Brad and I are very similar in that we see many things in black and white with minimal grey area. Unfortunately, nine times out of ten when he sees black I see white, and vice versa.

We went back and forth on it a couple of times. He doesn’t think that we need stricter laws, they are already too strict in his opinion. He doesn’t see why we need background checks, or why we should have to prove some sort of weapons competency before buying one. And he especially does not see why any gun owner should be forced to have his/her name on a list. I disagreed with each and every one of his stances. We weren’t getting anywhere, so finally I asked “is your fear that one day some government/law enforcement officer is going to knock on your door and demand that you turn over your guns?” Of course, he replied with “yes”. I simply responded with “you’re what’s wrong with America.” A statement that I still firmly believe (well, not Brad per se, but people who hold that same idiotic belief… Especially the outspoken ones) to this day. We didn’t talk for the rest of the ride home.

I am a gun owner. A responsible and reasonable gun owner. And I was the only gun owner in that conversation. Brad neither owned a gun nor did he have any intention on ever owning one. I’ll leave that there and let it marinade for a bit.

If you think the big bad government is going to take your boomsticks away from you, you are an idiot. They couldn’t take the guns away from PA (last I checked we had more guns than houses) without a revolt, let alone the country. And considering how much of the gun owning population is made up of law enforcement and military it would really turn into a civil war that neither side would win. Crack the window, turn off the porch light, Big brother isn’t coming! I think I’ve driven that point home enough… For now.

On the point of having to prove some sort of weapons handling/safety competency and possibly go through an stringent background check… Who gives a fuck!? I mean seriously. Get past your ego and your “I probably know more about guns than they do” bullshit and do it, even if for no reason other than to just appease them. So it takes longer, boo-fucking-hoo. This way at least I’ll know that Cockeyed Charlie down the street isn’t building an unchecked arsenal in his basement of guns that he’s seen more on television than in real life. We, not legally at least… But how many gangsters do you know named Chuck? Lighten up, it’s a joke.

I do not care, ask me more questions, question whether or not I know how (and when) to effectively use this weapon. Go through my background. Hold me to some sort of standard. And if I don’t meet it, show me the way, and/or the door. Now as for the list? I couldn’t give two shits. So someone might know that I own a gun….. And? Half of you assholes have those stupid “a gun owner lives here” signs in your yard anyway. Am I afraid of becoming a victim and having someone attempt to break in and steal my gun(s)? No. And do you know why? Because I own mother fucking guns! You can’t claim to NEED them for protection and and complain about being too much of a bitch to use them for protection in the same breath. Sack-up!

Oh, but some officer or official might come and check to make sure that you have the guns that you claim to have… Um… Good! Please, check. Let me know ahead of time and I’ll throw on a pot of coffee for ya(I’m just saying this for effect, I don’t actually own a coffeemaker), we can even go out to the range and let off a couple rounds together during your inspection (I’m not saying this just for effect, you can count them, check them for serviceability, and check my familiarity with it all in one shot… You kinda like that I threw the word “shot” in there don’t ya? Don’t lie). I can’t believe how uptight some of you outspoken idiots are, and how quick you are to call anyone who brings up gun control “uptight”. My concern is not the lowlifes who illegally get their hands on a pew-pew. My concern is the lowlifes (yup, said it) who legally buy guns that they have no business having. And before you get stupid and make up your own assumptions to get offended over, I’m not taking about different calibers or the whole “assault rifle” bullshit. I mean if you are an idiot and buy a gun (ANY gun) you are now just an idiot with a gun.

Now I understand the fear that things are gonna get hilariously out of hand. It’s a legitimate concern. Law makers creating rules about things outside of their wheelhouse is bad no matter what the issue. But that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t at LEAST have a conversation about it. Here’s a thought, we could help them make an informed decision on the best way to handle gun control. Holy fucking shit, I’m a damn genius.

I would rather take guns out of a million innocent gun owners hands than see another innocent victim of gun violence. The new system might have flaws… Scratch that… The new system will have flaws… But that doesn’t negate the fact that our current system is ass.


Until next time, stupid is as stupid does.

P.S. This is a photo of Man Weekend… Another one of those nights I wont soon forget stories. About half of the boomshakalakas that we brought with us are in this picture. This weekend deserves a post of it’s own honestly.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. Michael says:

    You murcans sure are a crazy lot mate…


    1. Lol I’ve been called worse


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